When you are feeling up, do you have this feeling that you will always be up? Like you can take on the world or at least paint an entire room?

I remember as a youth having lots of endorphins and running all over this park, but I dont excercise much anymore and rarely get that. Whenever I feel up I get the feeling that it wont last long, but thats pessimism and I try to stay away from that.

I don't know how we can feel up and down at the same time. It's weird.

Its called a Mixed episode. And I have experienced them one after another in split seconds. The feeling of a flash of deep depression doesn't go away right after you have it... it kinda dissipates. Then I jump right into racing thoughts, mania, etc.

Hallucinations

Just the other day in a meeting I felt this womans eyes popped in the back of her head, but this was just a dellusion. However when I was psychotic I remember seeing a crowd of people at the concert turn to me when I looked at them and they were all someone I knew.